How I Roll - That Other Player

I already talked about That One Player and how to work with them to make a decent game. Now I'm going to talk about That Other Player.

This is the player you can't read. Most of the time the players at the table open up and you get a feeling for what they want, what kind of person they are, if they're enjoying the game, etc. Then you get a player who isn't like that at all.

This player makes me feel insecure, personally. I'm not getting feedback to know if I'm running the game in a way that makes them happy. I start to second guess what I'm about to do and how I'm going to engage their character.

This is the one who doesn't want to help the villagers while the rest of the group does. This is the one who doesn't get excited about some kind of mystery they've tripped over. This is the one who does their part in the game but then you don't hear from them until the next game. This is the one who seems to enjoy the game but also seems to find it lacking.

It makes me want to throw a really big d20 at them and make them tell me what they're thinking.

Some things to try are flat out asking them what they think, trailing teasers across their path, paying close attention at various aspects of the game, and other frustrating ways to try to interpret their feelings. I know that flat out asking shouldn't be frustrating but it is if they won't give you a straight answer.

I'm not particularly subtle at times. Hence the "throw the really big d20" comment. I'll keep trying to find out what's in their head until I figure it out or I accept that I'll never figure it out. Other people with actual social skills will have a better chance at it than I do. When asking them if they're having fun gets no definitive answer I'll go with the option of doing what I do unless told otherwise.

This is another one where I don't have much of an answer. Doing the table check at the end of the game asking everyone what they liked and didn't like always feels weird to me since I don't know how honest any one person would be in front of everyone else. And asking separately can get slanted answers because they don't want to hurt my feelings or make me angry. I'm fine with hurt feelings and it would take a lot to make me angry. The d20 thing is frustration, not anger.

I can't draw a conclusion on this one. There's too much going on and it's specific to the group and GM. The game should be fun and a way to hang out as a group, either in person or online. When something feels off then address it and accept the answers given, I guess.